This is Sean’s Mom, Kim. It has been a little over 6 months since Sean died. It has been up and down, of course. We (Sean’s Dad ,Brother and I) got though the holidays, not great.. Now it’s his birthday month. My insomnia has returned, the tears are flowing. For some reason this birthday month is harder than I expected. We have had many positive events, a good presentation to community task force with the mayor, the police department, health department, hospital representatives…. Great conversations with elected officials. Even some significant hope of improvement in mental health treatment in our town and in our state.
Maybe because his birthday is so special for our family. A day with many wonderful memories. A few not so great ones. OK that time when Sean was homeless and I met him at a burger place to get him some food, no that one wasn’t great. He was really angry and difficult that night. However, most of the other birthdays were good. He would often rally for birthdays and even some holidays. It wasn’t until later in the spring when the mania would start, then the substance use. That’s when the transition would come, March OK, April not great, May and June horrible. So maybe it’s anticipatory grief?? or maybe I am just really sad to have lost someone so beloved.
Facebook Post August, 2017
want to share my thoughts on Sean Blake…he is unresponsive and the in the hospital. They don’t think he will survive. Sean appeared one day at Psychedelicatessen and I praised him as my savior for doing all the jobs around that no one liked or Thought about doing. We began a mentorship… I soon realized how troubled Sean became under the influence of drugs like heroin and alcohol. He would steal alcohol from me and provide it for others to think he was a cool guy. He created Drama, stole, lied and connived BUT he wanted to be a better person … he ask for redemption and made actual reparations with me and others whom he wronged. During Sean’s time incarcerated, he wrote me letters every few weeks … his attitude was positive and he was always looking to do good and be a productive part of a community. I reluctantly accepted Sean back into my life when he was most recently released from jail but over the last month , he has proven himself to be an honorable and dependable part of our community and someone I can memorialize as a golden child of Love with some dark shadows … please send your Thoughts and Love to this wild and wonderful Soul and his family.. may your journey through the Bardos be enriching Sean. I am glad to have known you and I call you a Friend. blessings.
Sean’s poem and prayer card on exhibit in 2018 . It was hard to donate this poem/artwork as it will not be returned. However, the message is important for our Representatives to hear.
Sean’s speech to the Legislators from the NECC in St. Johnsbury is available on the Instagram site. Sean is the first speaker. he implores the Representatives to do more for mental health and addiction treatment in jail. This was filmed in 2017.
Dear Mr. President
I Voted for you twice,
Do you mind, I really need two minutes of your time.
I hope you don’t mind I’ve composed a little rhyme.
Why do we still fight an unknown war in the Middle East.
They tell me it’s over, an amazing feat.
Nevertheless, I don’t see my green mountain boy on church street.
What about New York, a Yankee’s paradise.
You think all that money would suffice.
All the buyouts, bailouts and hostile takeovers.
Doesn’t anyone on Wall Street care about General Motors?
Minneapolis smiles turned into frowns.
Nothings but decay in the rust-belt towns.
People watch TV worrying about the Zombie apocalypse.
It already happened when heroin it the suburban metropolis.
The outbreaks already here.
Junkies prowl the streets in fear.
East coast life been a little frantic.
But we still go out a voted democratic.
You’ve done alright these last for years.
Please don’t leave this country in tears.
God bless America, and good luck to you.