Grief and Gratitude
2020 has been a challenging year and there has been a tremendous amount of grief for all of us. Loss of so many people, illness for others, loss of jobs. There has been tremendous fear as well. So much anxiety for the virus and our families, coworkers, and neighbors.
Having done so much grief-work this year, the load does feel lighter. I can remember without tears, beautiful holiday memories, fun times filled with optimism for the future. I can enjoy the present . Enjoy what we do have to be very happy about. Relish in our smaller family. The huge, gaping hole that was doesn’t seem quite as large this year.
There are a few strategies I have embraced. Not because I wanted to, because I had to learn new ways to cope. I start every morning with a few minutes of meditation. I enjoy the quiet, before my husband or dog rises to think of my day ahead. I read from a daily reader and contemplate the day. To me, meditation continues with a walk outside, when I can. The 30-50 minutes of exercise outside grounds me. The angst of the morning melts away with every step. I call it my daily dose of vitamin D. It may not be a huge hike or even a great calorie burner. It does settle my mood.
Before bed, in the evening, I do something relaxing before bed. TV or a meeting. Then I start my bedtime ritual which includes a gratitude practice. I read from a gratitude daily reader (Mark Nepo-The Book of Awakening) Then, I prioritize sleep.
On call nights and office days it means everything is shorter. I still try to get a few minutes in the day to start and end with intention and gratitude.
For the New Year, I hope to increase and improve my exercise regimen. I hope to continue to get out side more. Maybe some skiing, cross country skiing maybe downhill. I hope to get more sailing in. To do all this activity, I want to be in better shape. I hope some strength training will help with weight loss.
Since being diagnosed with diabetes I have had trouble managing my blood sugar, and weight has not been a huge priority. So this year I hope to improve on that area.
Peace and Love in the New Year, Sean’s Mom
for-kindness 
Thank you for being honest and open and vulnerable. I pray that you would find healing in writing and sharing your story. I was compelled to read several of the entries and I’m touched by your authenticity. May you be successful in your exercise and weight loss journey and stay healthy! Blessings.
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